Song of the Empath

Pardon your Wulf if this starts to wander. This is more a stream of consciousness. A glimpse inside the mind of the Wulf once his synapses were sparked by a song.

Please remember what Bilbo said:

Not all those who wander are lost.
-b. baggins The Lord of the Rings


Since I have become a blogger/poet I have had more than one person refer to me as a healer. At first I wasn’t certain what they meant, because I most certainly have caused my fair share of pain. (Boy I’ve done things in my life that are the exact OPPOSITE of healing.) In searching for clarification, I was told that I had been able to look into these people, past the wall of pain, and find their light. I had drawn it forth so that they, too, could see it. Maybe it’s the nature of this social medium, but it seems that a lot of writers I follow and that follow me refer to themselves as broken. Maybe it is just the nature of the empathic healer to find their way to the road of these so-called and self-proclaimed broken ones. Maybe it’s pure luck.

As I said in a piece I wrote the other day I know it is not all unicorns and lollipops. While the healer in me wishes it was all that, the realist knows it’s not and never could be. One of this healer’s other “powers”, as someone called it, is being an empath. It was not something I had ever considered myself, but I have come to trust others opinions of me more than my own. I can assure you that being empathic is often something one wishes they weren’t tapped into. We so want to fix. There is a genuine depth of anguish we feel that becomes real. It becomes visceral and palpable. It is also not something I can deny without disconnecting and shutting off completely. I am told, however, that one should not shut off their core parts. Empathy also makes one vulnerable. Well, I know it makes ME vulnerable to these overpowering emotions that take on a new life. Their own life. It requires a whole different skill to control. If left unchecked we tend to forget ourselves in the process. That is a fundamental problem with empathy. How much to take on without losing ourselves.

I know where and when my empathic abilities began to take shape. I can still see and feel the specific moment’s of my childhood that wove their way into the Wulf’s DNA and set me upon this path. No trauma. No abuse. But I felt things as a child that, upon reflection, were the infantile manifestations of a born empath. I remember lying awake at night listening to the normal arguments and feeling ill. I wanted them to stop. I needed them to stop. I wanted to MAKE them stop. I was, ultimately, as powerless to stop them as I am to stop others today. I remember a dream about my slightly older brother and a near death accident that occurred in that dream. I remember how I felt upon waking from that dream, frightened by what I saw and how relieved I was to learn it was only a dream. I wonder how I would have been had these events happened through familial dysfunction and not the normal functional fighting that all couples have. I am blessed by that family I was lucky enough to be born into. What I am learning, though, is those limitations when it comes to making things stop. Making other’s pain stop. No one can save but the smallest number of others. It is important to not let the empath lead the entire journey. It is important for the healer to take over, and know when there is no more to done. So, back to the song and the prompt.

A song started to play that I hadn’t given too much attention to before. It was one I liked, but I never dwelt on it. I never examined it. This listen, however, became different. Within these words I heard the need of this empath. The pain that I feel for the broken ones I connect with from time time. More importantly, though, I heard the anguish that I feel when I know my powers of healing are not enough. I also heard the voice of those in need. (Is that empathy as well?) Sometimes you still need more. We need to get that. We need to let you know we know we can’t fix everything. So ultimately, I guess, this is something I wanted to share.  Regardless of what’s left, we empathic healers still wish to give. And you who are in need are still so very precious.

Precious and fragile things
Need special handling
My God what have we done to You?

We always try to share
The tenderest of care
Now look what we have put You through…

Things get damaged
Things get broken
I thought we’d manage
But words left unspoken
Left us so brittle
There was so little left to give

Angels with silver wings
Shouldn’t know suffering
I wish I could take the pain for you

If God has a master plan
That only He understands
I hope it’s your eyes He’s seeing through

Things get damaged
Things get broken
I thought we’d manage
But words left unspoken
Left us so brittle
There was so little left to give

I pray you learn to trust
Have faith in both of us
And keep room in your hearts for two

Things get damaged
Things get broken
I thought we’d manage
But words left unspoken
Left us so brittle
There was so little left to give

29 comments

  1. Speak of the devil…
    This was wonderful what you said, as well as a corresponding song. You sure know how to pick.
    I wish I could take the pain for you…And this is why we all love you. I’m kinda tender tonight, as you can see.
    P.S. Thank you (there, I said it. Enjoying?)

    I’m not looking for absolution
    Forgiveness for the things I do
    But before you come to any conclusions
    Try walking in my shoes

    You’ll stumble in my footsteps
    Keep the same appointments I kept
    If you try walking in my shoes

    Morality would frown upon
    Decency look down upon
    The scapegoat fate’s made of me
    But I promise now, my judge and jurors
    My intentions couldn’t have been purer
    My case is easy to see

    I’m not looking for a clearer conscience
    Peace of mind after what I’ve been through
    And before we talk of any repentance
    Try walking in my shoes

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Morning. How interesting that you crossed my mind this very morning while I drove into work. And here you are!

      Whatever I said was well deserved and you should wear it proudly. I hope things grow brighter for you.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I completely agree with this. I actually was just waking up from a dream where I was using emotion to make objects move, and yet no one believed me except for a shadow of myself. It is really good to hear other empaths as well, I always feel drained from my healing abilities, but have worked in order to put a shield while still being there when needed. Boundaries are hard when you care so much, but with too much care, it can turn their energy into yours. Good article!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You are a truly beautiful person. There is so much I could say to you about this post, about the life of an empath, but for now, I will just say Thank you; for your kindness, your compassion, your heart, your authenticity and your incredible ability to find the light. I am grateful to be getting to know you!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I am really now just starting to understand and embrace my own empathic journey. Speaking of, I am late to meet this amazing 85 year old woman, who I see every week. She is telling me her story. Incredible. I will be back later to read more and say more, I am sure!!!

        Liked by 1 person

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